Monday, August 23, 2010

Minor relationship problems, advice greatly appreciated!?

We've been together for over a year now. Things have been great, theres a lot of love between us and we're best friend. We can talk about anything really. But recently things have become a bit more difficult. He begins to get quiet and look sad, I feel like hes pushing me away. He gets sad for no apparent reason and doesnt know why. Its happened more and more. I desperatley want to help but there nothing I can really do. It make me feel awful, I worry and have suffered quite badly from anxiety before, this has started to set it off again. Its making us miserable. We've tried talking, taking a break from eah other and avoiding each other when it happens. Nothing really works. I love him, I really do. There are times when we're fine and thouse are brilliant.We've spoken of a wonderful future and engagement has been mentioned. I cant leave him but Im finding this very hard to cope with, the sadness and worry are too much. Its painful. Please help, Im worried we're falling apart :( thanksMinor relationship problems, advice greatly appreciated!?
Whenever i read your posted question it strangely reminded me of me and my girlfriend. Sarah and myself have been together for 3 years this october and are deeply in love with one another. Things have been great for the most part for our entire relationship. Within the last 3 months it is like we began to drift apart. Some of the same things you spoke of were happening to us too (sarah has a anxiety problem even). We went on a break for a while and then realized we loved eachother too much to be apart, but we still worried about fixing our problems. What we had to do was sit down and have a heart to heart conversation together. We let it all out and what was bothering us and how we felt. We then layed down some new rules for our realtionship (things we felt we were not doing, but should) and we have been getting closer and closer to being the ';old us'; that we both missed so much. you and your boyfriend need to sit down and tell eachother exactly how you feel. You have to remember that so many people treat relationships too seriously. It is all about trust, love, companionship, and most importantly, having fun. If you cannot have fun together anymore and enjoy spending time together, things will not work out in the long run. I hope my too long response here might help out somewhat. If not i am sorry for making you read all this. GOOD LUCKMinor relationship problems, advice greatly appreciated!?
Im glad I was able to help. I wish you two the best of luck.

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Could be a few things going on here; he could be scared of making a commitment cos of past rejection or some deep seated fear of commitment but the fact that you've both discussed engagement and stuff wouldn't perhaps suggest this.





Some men need time to withdraw into their metaphorical cave when they have stuff on their minds; maybe he just needs some space at these times; nothing as formal as actually saying we will take a break from one another, just perhaps give him some time on his own when he feels like this.





It does sound like he's got some form of depression and may actually benefit from some counselling or a mild anti-depressant to lift his mood a bit.





I've been in a similar situation with my bloke and this situation can go in a downward spiral where you both feel down and anxious and can't be strong for each other. Have you got anyone in your family or friends you can discuss this with. Sometimes you need to get support from somewhere outside the relationship so you can be strong in it.





Hope that helps and you two go onto have a happy life together. xx
You are probably bored with each other. What you should do is talk about your day, and ask about his. Do not go deep in conversations. If it gets to a point where you can't take it anymore, just end it. Its gonna be harder if you wait any longer.
it sounds like he may be dealing with depression. either something personal is going on with him and he is afraid to talk to you about it. he might want to see a doctor. if he doesnt deal with this things between you guys will fall apart. i know you love him and want to help, but there may be nothing you can do about it till he gets help. just be there for him and be supportive. the more you push the issue, the more he will close you out. good luck. i wish i could help.
There is something he is not telling you..but you are being left out of the loop.. You know there is a point when someone is pulling you down that you have to cut them off for self preservation..Its hard and it hurts but you will look behind and be glad you did it.. if it was meant to be he will come around when he is better. but you cant fix all things in love.
only been a year, think about the stuff you love and how things will be next year with him acting this way, then think if this is how you want to live your life
could be a toxicity, could be a chemical imbalance.. could be allot of things.. the first thing I would do is talk to a Quantum Biofeedback proffessional about it..They can balance and hyper-relax him.. that will do allot. Not knowing if there is sleep problems, pain or all the details that is my best advice.
The relationship has fallen apart because he has fallen away. You are hanging on which is why is ';seems'; as if the relationship is falling apart. You deserve someone that wants you without reservation. He clearly does. Move on, quickly, for your sake.
Have you thought about maybe he's suffering from depression? Just a thought if he doesn't know why he's sad...I'm not sure what could have triggered it but that could be the case. Maybe have him go to a dr just to check it out? Its worth checking! If not, maybe try and get him to talk to someone, maybe there's something going on that you actually don't know about. Its possible! That's all i can think of...:( Sorry
i hade the same thing happen with ma and a girl


it got relly bad we were alwas fighting and mad at eachother


it was becomeing so much to coup with that in the end we hade to just break it off for good befor one of us killd someone
';He gets sad for no apparent reason and doesnt know why';. He does have a reason however that reason is not apparent to you because either he doesn't think you can take his explanation of why he is acting that way or it has to do with something you do that he doesn't feel comfortable talking to you about just yet.
Your relationship is falling apart. He seems to be shying from you and he could be afraid of marriage and divorce, marriage and no more dating, marriage that becomes ho-hum, raising children, he is just not sure you are the one, he thinks one of you is going to move away, he thinks you are too good for him, he has heard a rumor about you, or he is not ready for sex (like a rash). You need to get him to tell you what it is. He will probably first say something like you are smothering him or he just needs time or space. Perhaps it would be easier for him if you ran down the list and asked him to just shake or nod his head to answer to each one until you find out what it is and if you can do something about it or just accept it as a difference you can't do anything about.
Talk to him and ask him if there is something wrong....I wish you all the best
Some men withdraw when they have something bothering them, They need to work it out themselves don't pressure him girls want to talk thru guys want to think thru give him some time when he is ready he will talk to you.
You need to find out what is making him act like that. Maybe he is realizing how serious your relationship has become and he's afraid and worried about the committment.





Maybe it is his work or school or his family. Without knowing what is causing him to act like that, there is no way for you to help him. If he refuses to tell you, then he can't expect you to help him or change what might be bothering him.





He may also be depressed, look up the signs of depression and see if any of them apply to him, if so, you may want to ask him to see a doctor.
Ask him maybe one of friends died. Maybe he has cancer or something, but I would still love her if it was my girlfriend.
you can always make a surprise dinner and have it together and you might wanna consider going to the cinemas more often and watch your favourite movies and maybe crooze around town sometimes and go for parties. well that is whayt i can reccomend you to do have sme wine and make your patner start talking by asking him some questions i hope this works for you

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